| Bio
One night I was walking through the local park on my way home from the pub with a bag of beers, and I saw an old lady wrestling over her handbag with a young man. I ran over to approach the man and he quickly let go of the bag and screamed "help, that fucking old cunt lady took my bag". I wasn’t sure if he was lying, but I introduced myself to him anyway. He said his name was "Bill . . . . . Wild Bill". I thought 'wow, what a fucking tool', but he had a crazy look in his eye like he would make love to a man for a beer, so I gave him one for free instead.
Me and bill kept walking. After a couple minutes we noticed a bloke sleeping on the ground covered in newspaper and his own piss with a cock drawn on his forehead. The guy seemed to be well dressed though, as though he wasn’t actually homeless but just loved sleeping on the street because he was just a weird cunt. I felt sorry for the guy, and I noticed that he had an empty beer next to him so I said, "hi I'm roger, would you like a beer?", he said his name was block head. I threw him a beer and we all continued walking.
Further on. We came across a guy who seemed to be working on something under lights. He had an area pegged off and he was carefully digging and brushing dirt off, what looked like, a big dinosaur skeleton. I said "wow, how the fuck did u find the remains of a dinosaur here in centennial park!?” to which he replied "that’s what I do, I’m an archinamoligicalist!". I thought it was weird for a foot surgeon to be doing something like that in the park, but I introduced myself and threw him a beer anyway. He said his name was Leigh, then put his tools down and came with us.
We noticed something moving in the shrub up ahead. Some bushes seemed to be shaking and behind them we saw, what looked like, a bear fucking an eagle! This bear was really going for it and we were all worried for the eagle so we picked up some sticks and approached the bear. We started hitting the bear, screaming "get your dick out of that eagle". Then all of a sudden the bear spoke, "what the fuck do you guys want!” said the bear with sweat pouring out of everywhere. Then at closer look, the bear was actually a guy, just with lots of back hair, and the eagle was actually still an eagle! I saw that this guy was thirsty so I asked him what his name was and if he wanted a beer and why he was having sex with an eagle. He said his name was Stace and he had half a pill and didn’t know what he was doing there and he would love a beer. Then we made
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